we need to talk
I think you're right. I think it's necessary. I think it's inevitable. I think I don't wanna.
I'm one step away from literally shaking right now. The past couple of days have been absolutely fabulous. (minus the sheer rudeness of an extent I have never experienced before) Earlier this year I wasn't very happy and I wanted for the school year to end more than anything. However, as the semester comes to an end, I desperately don't want to leave. This time in exactly one week I will be finishing packing and heading for home. This makes me terribly sad. Don't get me wrong. I love and miss my family and am grateful for the chance to be near them, but suddenly this isn't what I see. Summer suddenly means not seeing friends for 3 months. Summer means working (probably 60 hr/wk once again) and having no life. Summer means living back home and suddenly losing any freedoms I have. Summer means missed opportunities with really great people. Summer means facing all of the old friends that I have unfortunately lost touch with. Summer means standing up for myself in the face of my corruptors and telling them they're wrong. Summer means the possibility of never again seeing the people that are transferring... whom ever they may be. Summer means leaving it all behind, and I having no control over it.
So what do you want me to say? You'd really like it if we could talk at some point today. Nothing good ever came from these words. You spun them so they sound inviting and pleasant, but I still fear them. One week. How much can change in one week? A lot, but not enough.
I already can see myself driving off campus on the verge of tears and a silent ride home.
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